FMBR Editorial: April, 2001
An Awakening Call & A Blessing
Fatima Saleh
Cancer for me was an awakening call and a blessing. Before that I was going through life with a narrow-minded view. I'm a single mother with two young children and an engineer who had escaped from the terrors of life in Afghanistan. I will never forget that day when I went to get the biopsy results from my doctor -- I had breast cancer. I kept asking why after all the things that I have been through; I had to taste this bitterness? Yet somehow I felt that this experience was like a doorway in front of me and I had to pass through and find out about the other side.
The day before surgery a friend at work took me for a special Shamanic healing/prayer. I was so blessed by that mystical experience that I felt like I was sitting on a white sheet and flying in the sky -- lighter then a feather. The next day I was still in that blessed state. The surgery that the doctors said would take 8-10 hours took only 5 hours. I recovered peacefully and, apart from minor discomforts, I felt fine.
After surgery I received two magical gifts -- a beautiful white basket with a small gray haired angel with a big smile, and a recording of songs by Kathy Zevada. I was so inspired by her beautiful songs/prayers that I started singing and "dancing" in bed. Two nights later I couldn't help but get out of bed and dance in the dark with drainage bottles hanging from my body. After praying the whole night with Kathy Zevada songs, a very young nurse arrived with test equipment. She had a beautiful round face, short blondish hair, and plain white smock. I commented how beautiful her face and skin were -- like an angel. I kept talking about her beauty. A sense of something wonderful about to happen made me joyous and peaceful. When she finished she stood at the bottom of the bed and said, "You have stars on you." I laughed and without thinking said, "You are seeing stars on people's heads? You must be an angel!" She looked straight in my eyes, and said, "You will be healed very fast, you will see."
Three days later I was feeling much better. I was praying with my eyes closed to lift the suffering of a 90 year old woman in the next room. Suddenly I felt warm arms around mine and saw an older lady with short gray hair and a big smile bending over me. She kissed my cheek and then whispered to me, "When you came in I told you that you would be fine and now you are." A sense of peace, tranquility, joy, harmony, and stillness came over me that I wouldn't exchange for anything in the world. Noise brought me out of that blissful state -- then sunlight hit the window and I looked and surprisingly saw the little gray haired angel with the big smile looking at me.
The afternoon that I was discharged I prayed from my heart for any patient that will come to that room in the future to heal fast like me. As the nurse pushed my wheelchair out the doorway I heard the glorious sound of the Hallelujah Chorus. The nurse said that every Wednesday at exactly 5:00 p.m. the Church Choir would sing. I was crying from inner joy and bliss. This whole experience changed my life. I consider myself a new person that has been blessed. I am now so thankful for every moment of my life.
Cancer Assistance
Try "International Association of Cancer Victors and Friends" (IACVF), http://www.cancervictors.org. Additional: information contact FMBR member Dixie Keithly: 408-249-4516; kkuplady@yahoo.com.
Fatima Saleh,
FMBR Volunteer